104 Days Into My Journey

Hey, hey everyone! I am so excited to be writing about this. 104 days. I AM 104 DAYS INTO MY JOURNEY! First of all, it doesn't seem like it has been that long because 104 is a big number! And secondly, it does seem like that long because I see how far I have come which is a GREAT thing to see.

I started May 18th. That is when I took my measurements, my photos and just really started to get my act together. I was kind of doing it the week before but came back with a vengeance on the 18th. So to me that is my day 1. Think about it guys, 21st of March, I was going through my miscarriage. Dealing with my inner demons. Battling depression, PTSD and just in a major funk. Decided I had enough with it and got my life back! And now I am 104 days from that time and I feel like a totally different person on the inside. I am making huge progress with my counseling. I am believing in myself. And I am loving life. (Although I do have those times where I wish things would be different but they aren't and I can't do anything about it.)

So 104 days. (Sorry I just like saying that!) How did I do it?

1) Clean eating using the 80/20 rule. 80% of the time I am eating clean whole foods. No processed boxed foods. Only fresh clean foods. And the other 20% of the time I allow myself to indulge in a nice dessert, ice cream, or a meal I typically wouldn't have during the week. (cream saucy stuff, or a nice burger and fries!)

2) I drink Shakeology everyday to help me curve my cravings and to know that I am getting all the vitamins and minerals that I need to stay healthy but it doesn't do all the work for me. I have to decide not to eat the crap foods. I have to stay committed to what I am doing.

3) I also added in 30 minutes of exercise everyday. Even Sundays, but that is yoga and doesn't feel like exercise. Just another meditation to me.

4) And on top of that I have added in at least 10 minutes of listening or reading motivational, confidence building, learning to love myself podcasts or books. Commonly known as Self Help. But you know what. We all need a little self help! And it is ok.

And in my mind it is too long because I didn't workout at all during July and only ate clean for 2 weeks of the month because of recovery. So July I don't even want to count but I am. Anyways, in those 104 days I have lost over 15 inches. And over 15 pounds. (again not doing anything in the month of July) What is pretty cool to think about though is where am I going to be in another 104 days???

I see myself where I am going to be, mentally and physically. It is amazing. I know that by Christmas I will be at my next goal weight of under 200 lbs. I know that by May 2016 I will be at my goal weight of 165. (unless I get pregnant than that number will be different but I will still be working out everyday and doing everything I can to be healthy!)

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30 Advanced Workout Challenge | September 30 day Full Body Workout

September is almost here! Check out this month long full body workout to get your body if great shape! Love this that it has rest days every 4 days! Are you going to do September's 30 day challenge? Comment below! 

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Sexy Arms Workout

Preschool Lunch

Mason is starting pre-school in 2 weeks from today! YAY!!!! (I may be just a little bit excited for that fact!) He is one picky eater thought and I would much rather him take the option on the left more than the option on the right. I am a clean eater. My son, IS NOT!

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He can eat gold fish till the cows come home. PB&J every meal. No more eggs for him, no more oatmeal. "EWWWW!" is what he says now to that. Pasta, yeah right. And if we tell him he can't have anything else, he would rather not eat at all. (like last night.) He will do hot dogs, without the buns but only if 5 Guys make it. (yeah, at a lost on that one!) No string cheese, no meat, no anything that resembles the color GREEN!

Last night we made these pocket sandwiches (just like in the picture which he said looked good by the way!) And he refused to eat it! He picked out the bread, meat and cheese for it all by himself. And wanted nothing to do with it. He wanted to eat more chips and grapes.

So moms! I got these recipe books from 100 Days of Real Food for help and inspiration. The food looks GREAT! Does anyone out there have any help for me. Tips and tricks. I want him to want to eat healthy foods, and a variety of foods too, not just the same thing over and over. (At least when I do it, is is something more substantial and healthy!) I am at a loss and I really need some help!

I did find this site by Keeley McGuire yesterday for 20 non sandwich lunches while searching. Cute ideas!

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My Running Troubles

As you have probably noticed. I haven't blogged in awhile. I'm sorry that I left you all hanging. I have been deal with some hard stuff lately. And I finally decided it is time to get it off my chest and share with you what's been going on.

This blog was mainly started around me and my running and what running has done for me. It has since morphed into general health and wellbeing which is great but I have been so ashamed because I have been having such a personal emotional time dealing with my love of running lately.

I have major PTSD right now in regards to my miscarriage. I always thought PTSD was for people in the military or who have gone through other things in life. But never in regards to a miscarriage. But I do. And it is so freaky! I have nightmares of the day, I have flash backs. The scary thing for me  is I get panic attacks and get anxious when I think, talk or do some of the things that took place the day of my miscarriage. It is a real thing guys! I can't breath and I start to freak out. I look for a way to escape. I have been having panic attacks on my Saturday walks. I am usually talking with another lady and try to just let it be but 2 weeks ago I was looking for a way out. The "safety" car. By the time it came around I was better but it freaked me out that 5 months after my miscarriage this is still happening. I thought I would be better by now. But I am not. I am still working with my counselor and we are making progress but I am still working through it. Here is the thing though, I know that it was completely out of my hands and that I lost the baby but just things that took place are coming to light in what happened and how close I was to not being here. It is starting to catch up with me now. And I am coming up on my due date. So that isn't helping much either.

And it isn't just with running, I was cleaning up after having guests last week and I started getting all anxious and nervous because it was during cleaning up after guests that I started my miscarriage. I even get anxious at church and in other areas. I feel so embarrassed for feeling this way, and I find myself shamming myself. I should be better! It wasn't my fault But I am not. I am not always happy, and positive because I am human. I have been through very traumatic experience and it has made a huge dent in my life.

What is cool though is that I haven't given up on exercise or me. I still am doing my daily workouts, and I am clean eating. I am working on me mentally too to help me stay positive and see the good in all situations. And I don't have bad days anymore. I just have bad moments in my day which is so amazing! I just can't do running right now, and that is ok. I will get back into it. Will it sucks starting over AGAIN! You bet!!! But I have to work on me mentally first before I can put my heart and soul into something that I love, which is running.