Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Blessing In Disguise...

We have received more information about why this happened and how much of a blessing in disguise this actually was. If you missed what happen you can read my experiences with my 3rd miscarriage here. Crazy to think that it was a blessing but you will see...

Monday before discharge my doc came in to talk to us. Matt was there this time to hear all the lovely details. My doc repeated a lot of the same info he had told me, and I seemed better able to understand what he was saying and not so "out of it."

He told us how the placenta did detach from the uterus but not all the way. I passed the baby but not the placenta. I probably passed the baby around 11:30pm or so and continued to bleed until surgery which wasn't until after 1am. I started to hemorrhage because my body was trying to get the placenta out but it wouldn't release like it should have and I just had a gaping open wound that wasn't being able to close up. Thankfully I am a good blood clotter because I could have bleed out a lot sooner than I did. (I really think I was being watched over. It wasn't my time to go.) By the time I was in surgery I had lost 4 units of blood and it was still just coming out.

My doc said most people don't realize how lifesaving a D&E surgery can be. He stating again that I would have died before passing the placenta naturally, which is really freaky to think about for me and for my family.

My doc also mentioned that during the surgery that he noticed a funny smell to my placenta. I know that sound weird but that is often how an infection is found during surgery. My BFF K used to be an OR nurse and we were talking about it and it is a very pronounce smell that just isn't quite right. With the room as sterile as it is smells stand out. Doc is pretty sure that the reason why my placenta detached is because it was dying. It was infected. Therefore it was infecting the baby. Because it was so early in the pregnancy had I remained pregnant she wouldn't have survived, or would have had birth defects. And in regards to me the infection could have been a silent killer to me. I would have gotten really sick and they wouldn't have know to test my placenta for an infection. I could have gone septic and then also again, died from that. Or the infection could have infected my uterus and I could have lost it and lost the chance to have any more children. See what I mean. This miscarriage was a blessing in disguise. The placenta was sent to the pathology lab for testing and to confirm the infection but my doc is so awesome and knows what he is doing that we are pretty sure this is what it was. But we have not received the pathology report back yet.

What a strange turn of events. Obviously I have a guardian angel looking out for me and it certainly isn't my time to go just yet.

Oh and one more piece to the puzzle. Remember how I was spotting 2 weeks ago and that put me on bed rest so that I couldn't do the 10 miler. Doc said that had I had done the 10 miler, the placenta more than likely would have ripped more forcefully away causing a bigger hole. Mine ripped but not too much (remember the pop I felt). But had I been running I would have probably died on the course from blood loss right there. So HELLO, so glad I didn't do the race.

I have felt a weight lifted from me knowing this. And I feel ready to talk about my emotions I think. Give me another day or two to put it down but I certainly feel more at peace with what happened.

I have received an overwhelming response to Monday's post. I guess there just isn't a lot of miscarriage material out there. I have been thanked for sharing my story and for the strength that I have to relive it through writing it. But it needs to be done. I am so glad to share what I can. There is more to the miscarriage than I wrote but I wanted to spare people with the graphic details of the more unpleasant things I experienced. I pray I never have to go through anything like that again. But I am at peace now. I know that this was God's will and plan for me. This has helped strengthen me in ways I never knew could. And most of the strength I have felt have been from each of you. From the prayers to thoughts, it has truly been an amazing experience. Thank you friends for all of your support.

2 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing. So sorry you had to go through this but thankful that you saw Gods hand in your life and were willing to share. Hang in there. -Roseanne

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  2. I'm so very sorry for your loss, but grateful for your willingness to share so openly. Miscarriages and infertility have tortured so many of my friends and it is encouraging to see someone addressing it head-on. Prayers for your recovery!

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