Connect the Dots Ginger | Becky Allen: Due Date Disappointment

Monday, September 26, 2016

Due Date Disappointment

So...your due date has come and gone and you are just sitting here waiting for "WHEN IS THE BABY GOING TO COME OUT!" For 9 months you have been waiting and counting down to your DUE DATE and then BAM, it arrives and nothing happens. Plus all the other moms around you or in your online groups are all having their babies but they are only at 38 weeks. And everyone around you is super excited too and you are getting phone calls, messages and contacted by everyone and their sister, anxiously awaiting for baby to come. Asking if you have had the baby yet and when you think it is going to happen. It can be just frustrating because you just never know unless you have a scheduled induction or c-section. Only 5% of women deliver on their due date.

Worse yet, there is possibly no labor progress. I have read it from other moms and have experienced it myself. The waiting game SUCKS! Collin was 5 days late. But what made it worse for me on this pregnancy is that for the last 2 months I have had 9/23 8 pounds 3 ounces, stuck in my head. My mind just picked this date to have her early in the morning and when the date just came and went and I was still pregnant, I felt so bummed. Now sitting at 40 weeks and 5 days pregnant and still, no baby. And for the past week, I have been having on and off contractions. It is just a waiting game!

SO HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH DUE DATE DISAPPOINTMENT?

1. Realize that the due date is just an ESTIMATE! That the due date is flexible. Some babies need less time to bake while other want a little more. As much as I hear it  from everyone who messages me, and ugh, don't want to believe it, that the baby will come when they are ready, it is true. Without any intervention, 5% of women deliver on their due date. On Average, first time moms deliver 10 days over their due date. And second or more time moms tend to carry to 40 weeks and 3 days. Only 10% of moms will carry longer than 42 weeks. WITHOUT ANY INTERVENTION.

2. Old Wives Tales to induce are truly that...OLD TALES! Dancing under the moon naked (best if full moon), bumpy car rides, pineapple. Sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. It all depends on if your body if "ready" for labor.

3. There are ways to try to naturally induce your labor but again, if the body isn't ready it probably won't work. 10 natural ways to induce labor:

  1. Castor oil
  2. Sex, sex, and more sex
  3. Nipple Stimulation
  4. Evening primrose oil EPO
  5. Red Raspberry Leaf Tea
  6. Spicy Food
  7. Acupuncture
  8. Exercise
  9. Acupressure
  10. Membrane Stripping
4. RELAX! Sometimes we get so worked up that we clamp up and that goes against the natural, body trying to open to push a baby out, feeling. If you are anxious to have the baby. Have fears about labor, or birthing a baby, or even after baby comes. Talk to your partner and work them out. The process of releasing fears can actually help you go into labor. Take some time to relax and decompress. Remember that once baby comes you won't have quiet time, alone time or time to just go in the bath for an hour. You are going to be feeding, changing and taking care of a whole new baby. It is going to be a big change. Address your fears, relax and release. 
5. Turn off your computer. Unplug from social media if you have to. Don't respond to text messages. Just turn off everything and don't get frustrated with what is going on around you. The news of other moms having their babies or people contacting you can get frustrating. Again making you close up and be tight instead of releasing and being relaxed. If you get overwhelmed with people asking when baby is coming, just don't respond or just turn everything off. And the same goes for when you have the baby. If you want to have a day or 2 of no one knowing but you and your partner and just family, that's ok too. No one should get upset at you for you wanting your peace and quiet. You will post your announcement when you are ready to do so. Don't feel like you have to post the second you go into labor. Or the second the baby is born. With Collin he was in distress for the first 6 hours. We didn't post anything about having him or what he or we were going through. Only a handful of people knew he was born. And that is ok! 

Just know that it is ok to feel sad and frustrated that you are 40+ weeks pregnant. But before you know it your baby will be snuggling in your arms and your life completely changed for the better! 

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